i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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