Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
