My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
