Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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