shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You're a waste of cheezeits
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize