did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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