i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
