I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
