This is not my ceiling
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
