So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
