Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Randomize
