Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
