we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
