It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
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