Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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