some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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