even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Randomize