She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
