Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
