he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
