better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
