My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
