just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Girls should come with a carfax report
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
