when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
