I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
