if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
