dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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