Rock
Scissors
Fuck
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Randomize
