Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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