i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
