Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize