I wish I only lived at night.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
why is half of my head shaved?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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