if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
someone owes me an orgasm
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
