Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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