Well douche your snatch and let's go!
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
