that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
You had me at "let me see your balls"
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
