Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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