I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
