I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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