well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
everyone is single if you try hard enough
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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