we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize