i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
