kristin has been a bad kristin
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
