Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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