Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Randomize
