i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
