Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
