Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
