I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
