Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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