Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
